Incarcerated youth

Escape

I want to escape, I want to get out
I can’t take it, I say. “Help me”, I shout
I’m afraid to live, I’m afraid to die.
Afraid to believe and I just don’t know why
The truth, I’ve found is so real.
Even more genuine than the pain that I feel/
For so long I lived free, answering to no one but me.
I can’t live this life now that I know what is real.
I’m trying my best, but Man, what’s the deal?
Am I destined to lose my life for what’s true?
Or am I burdened to live not knowing what to do?
I can no longer deny the God that I’ve met.
I’m just a gambler who’s lost the last bet.
My heart is aching to be closer to Him.
My body is longing for the world I live in.
The prayers that I pray haven’t fallen on deaf ears.
But l have ignored the answers for many years.
I’m crying out now, though it’s taken a while.
I’ve strayed so far, my life seems so vile.
The things I praised were not of the Lord.
The things I did He would not have adored.
But now God, I only want to follow you
And do only the things you ask me to do